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  Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.

  Replies (0) Good night (0) Bad night (0) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?

  Replies (0) Good night (12) Bad night (11) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Can I have him when you're done?

  Replies (3) Good night (81) Bad night (6)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl

  Replies (0) Good night (53) Bad night (16) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard

  Replies (0) Good night (73) Bad night (12) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.

  Replies (5) Good night (98) Bad night (18)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.

  Replies (4) Good night (46) Bad night (112) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.

  Replies (0) Good night (118) Bad night (17) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.

  Replies (2) Good night (205) Bad night (27) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him

  Replies (2) Good night (107) Bad night (22) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested

  Replies (6) Good night (88) Bad night (163) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?

  Replies (3) Good night (155) Bad night (27)
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  Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.

  Replies (3) Good night (158) Bad night (22) Order T-Shirt
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  (352): View more from Florida

  I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.

  Replies (7) Good night (432) Bad night (30) Order T-Shirt
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  Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...

  Replies (6) Good night (95) Bad night (326) Order T-Shirt

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